Former THE PRACTICE star DYLAN McDERMOTT suffered for his art while playing a gruesome drug-dealing biker in WONDERLAND - he based the character on the man who killed his mother.

Although the authorities concluded McDermott's mum died of self inflicted wounds, the actor, who was five when she passed away, feels sure she was killed by her biker boyfriend.

And he recalled the monster who haunted his childhood dreams to create bearded biker DAVID LIND opposite Val Kilmer and Lisa Kudrow in Wonderland.

He says, "This guy had a tremendous influence on me."

And McDermott admits he was able to put his memories of his mother's one-time boyfriend to bed after bringing them to his new character.

He adds, "When you are able to use something that hurt you so much and use it in such a positive way, you transcend it."

31/10/2003 02:29