The former 'Beverly Hills 90210' star was left devastated when her TV mogul father, Aaron Spelling, passed away after a stroke in 2006 but she claims her spouse demanded all her attention in the weeks afterwards, rather than giving her space to grieve.
The 41-year-old actress opened up during a therapy session with Dean, which was recorded during a Confessions special of her 'True Tori' reality TV show.
She said: ''I remembered when my dad died, that night, back at our house, you made it all about you. I wasn't allowed to grieve because I had to take care of you and you took that away from me... you took away the grief for my father.
''You were feeling really bad, you didn't have the chance to get to know him. And you wouldn't have that chance, everyone would be judging you and it turned into a fight.''
Dean - who recently admitted to cheating on Tori during a two-day affair with a woman named Emily Goodhand - was quick to defend himself over her accusations.
He explained: ''I get emotional around death.''
The pair - who were married in 2006 and have four children Liam, seven, Stella, six, Hattie, two, and Finn, 22 months - discussed Dean's infidelity during another intense therapy session.
He said: ''Emily was there. ... I wasn't attracted to her. It was just like a warm body. I felt like I was on autopilot...
''It was an escape, just like drugs and alcohol.''
''We have four kids. In the sex department there are ebbs and flows. ... Do I always want more with you? Absolutely. Every day all day. I'm insatiable.
''Do I want more? Yeah. She has complications from the last pregnancy. Our sex life wasn't awful, but it wasn't stellar.''
Tori replied: ''It was never enough for you! I wore that guilt all the time thinking he's going to cheat on me. I can never give you enough sex.''
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The film is expected to continue without Mendes' involvement.