The 32-year-old SLIPKNOT star, whose life has been blighted by drug and alcohol abuse, is most ashamed of the time he babysat his child GRIFFIN.
He says, "I used to be a really fun drunk, but there was a point where it stopped being fun and became a need.
"The first year of my son's life I was f**king unavailable because I was drunk the whole time.
"I've never admitted this to anybody, but one night my wife went to see Mudvayne and I got so ripped that I was sitting at home taking care of my son while I was wasted and it didn't bother me at all. That's f**ked up."