Nikki Bella feared she was ''letting her fans down'' when she called off her engagement to John Cena.

The 'Total Divas' star was worried that the couple - who have decided to take time apart to find themselves - would be ruining a ''fairytale'' by giving each other the time they need but Nikki is hopeful they could get back together one day.

Speaking on her reality show 'Total Bellas', she said: ''Even though I was going through depression, I think when you have a relationship in the public eye, it's like you don't want to let your fans down. And everyone's fairy tale was John and I getting married, Superman and Wonder Woman ... so you just force yourself to believe it, too, even if you start to feel something different. I feel like I'm starting the journey of finding me again ... and when I heal myself and find whats wrong with me, he will be there. And if not, it wasn't meant to be.''

Meanwhile, Nikki previously insisted her and John are ''just friends'' right now and are trying to work on both theirselves and their relationship in the hope they may get back together.

She said: ''Right now, we're just friends. We're working on each other and trying to work on us, and we talk every day. He is not only my best friend, but he truly is one of the best people I have ever met, and he has patience with me and he has really taught me a lot over the last few months, and I think one of those things is an inner strength that I thought I had, but didn't realise how strong I had it.''