Former 5IVE star Abz Love has revealed he contemplated suicide after performing in front of a meagre crowd in a bar.
Abz Love contemplated suicide after performing in front of a meagre crowd in a bar.
The 38-year-old singer - whose life spiralled out of control following 5IVE's split in 2001 - agreed to perform at Yates's bar on the advice of his bandmate Scott Robinson, but Abz was so underwhelmed by the experience, it left him wanting to cut his wrists.
Speaking exclusively to BANG Showbiz, Abz - who started abusing drink and drugs after the band's split - recalled: ''I went in the bathroom and there was a bottle of red wine in there and I locked the door and my ex was in the room at the same time as well and I was screaming and crying and like f***ing pulling a tantrum like, what the hell?
''And then there was a bottle of red wine and I smashed that in the bathroom ... and it looked like blood, obviously. Red wine - it looked like blood - and something compelled me to pick up some glass and just start slicing my wrist.
''I've got these little gashes but you know what, it was again a cry for help ... this is a cry for help.''
Initially, Abz rubbished the idea of performing in the bar.
But Scott convinced him to give it a go, reasoning they would be able to make easy money from a few performances.
He shared: ''I was like f**k that! I ain't doing that s**t! He was like, 'try it, man. It's good money - we'll just travel around a little bit.'''
But, as Abz predicted, he was completely underwhelmed by the experience of playing in front of such a meagre crowd.
He confessed: ''I remember that first show I did I couldn't handle it ... I was like, 'I used to play Wembley, now I'm here playing f**king Yates's.'''
Abz's new TV show, 'Me and My Addiction', airs at 9pm on Wednesday (25.04.18) on Channel 5.
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