SIR Michael Caine entertained Queen Elizabeth II during a royal dinner by telling her rude jokes. The monarch asked the actor to make her laugh - and he recited his favourite gags, made famous by late British funnyman Tommy Cooper. Caine explains, "I told her about four or five Tommy Cooper jokes: 'My wife is very big and she was standing on the corner of the street and the neighbours came down and said, 'Come on fellas break it up'; 'I have given up sex for food, I've got a mirror over the dining room table.' "She laughed at them all."