R+B star Mary J Blige decided to seek help for her drug and alcohol problems after an abusive boyfriend put a gun to her head. The singer turned to drugs to cope with issues from her traumatic childhood and finally realised her life was spiraling out of control. She says, "The relationship I was in was so terrible, I had a gun to my face. "At that point, I said to myself, 'There's something wrong with me. Guys don't want to stick around because they are ashamed of me.' Ouch! That gives me the chills right now!" When Blige met her future husband, Kendu Isaacs, she initially treated him badly because she didn't know how to behave in a healthy relationship. She adds, "(I treated him) so badly for a while, because I'd never experienced real love before. I was suspicious. It seemed too good to be true. I remember lying on the bed with my head on his chest. "I decided to stop drinking that night and forgive all the people who had hurt me and to forgive and love myself, because I loved him and I wanted to be true."