Jennifer Aniston, Angelina Jolie and Drew Barrymore are among a long list of celebrities living fictional lives in a new mystery novel by director Steven Soderbergh's wife Jules Asner.
Asner, a former model and TV correspondent, has created a parallel universe in her upcoming tome entitled Whacked - which follows a fictional character as she seeks revenge on a cheating boyfriend and mingles with real-life stars.
Her characters make controversial observations about Barrymore, who is "about to expire like spoiled milk" and Angelina Jolie: "God doesn't really make size-zero women with size-36C bustlines, right?"
Asner insists she didn't ask stars' permission to include them in the book - and isn't worried about a backlash.
She tells the New York Daily News, "I didn't ask permission. Maybe I should have! I know Ryan (Seacrest) - I don't think he'd be bothered. And Jen (Aniston) is the sweetest, nicest person in the world. I'd only mention her in a great capacity."