The Ranch

"Good"

The Ranch Review


Anyone who's ever seen any documentary footage of real Nevada brothels (or has been to one personally -- hey, we don't judge), knows that the ladies that typically work there are hardly mistakable for Hollywood starlets.

Never mind that. If you're willing to suspend disbelief -- completely and utterly -- you might find The Ranch a curious diversion.

Finding information about The Ranch is a bit tricky -- and given the presence of reasonably big star Amy Madigan and director Susan Seidelman (Desperately Seeking Susan), there's a small amount of credibility here. It appears that Madigan was meant to anchor this not as a movie but as a TV series for HBO or Showtime (based on the copious amount of nudity and the setting, seeing as it's set in a brothel and all). The show didn't make it, so rather than drop the footage into the dumpster, the producers figured they'd release it as a 90-minute "movie" on DVD. The result is a film that feels an awful lot like a long TV show -- with no real closure to any of the half-dozen stories it starts up with.

The two fleshiest stories revolve around one hooker (Samantha Ferris) who is retiring to get married, only that doesn't go as planned, and a bit about a former Hollywood actress (Nicki Micheaux) run out of town and forced into prostitution as a last resort. The remainder of the gals at the Diamond Ranch get small stories of their own, from the business-is-business madam (Madigan) to the raunchy lady in the schoolgirl outfit (Paige Moss) to the slightly older divorcee (Jessica Collins) who has to balance social engagements (and the inevitable spotting of a client away from the ranch) and motherhood with, well, screwing guys for money. Every girl (sans Madigan) has her day in the bedroom: Those looking for cheesecake have come to the right place, especially with the unrated version of the DVD.

The film/show is well-acted and shows some promise -- it's something a lot of people might have watched as a regular series, though no one would have admitted it. Unfortunately, as a movie, the whole affair is a bit cockeyed, and it just doesn't come off like a movie. Still, considering they put My Big Fat Greek Life on DVD, you could do worse than checking out this aborted TV series on home video, as long as you treat it as such.



The Ranch

Facts and Figures

Run time: 90 mins

In Theaters: Monday 5th July 2004

Distributed by: MGM Home Entertainment

Reviews

Contactmusic.com: 3 / 5

IMDB: 5.1 / 10

Cast & Crew

Director:

Starring: as Shayna, as Kim, as Taylor, as Velvet

Contactmusic


Links



Advertisement

New Movies

Tom of Finland Movie Review

Tom of Finland Movie Review

Finnish artist Tuoko Laaksonen used the name "Tom of Finland" as he drew explicit illustrations...

A Ghost Story Movie Review

A Ghost Story Movie Review

Filmmaker David Lowery reunites the stars from his offbeat Western Ain't Them Bodies Saints for...

Atomic Blonde Movie Review

Atomic Blonde Movie Review

From the co-director of John Wick, this similarly styled action romp puts Charlize Theron front...

Girls Trip Movie Review

Girls Trip Movie Review

This movie's premise basically sounds like The Hangover with added black girl power. But it's...

Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie Movie Review

Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie Movie Review

There's so much manic energy in this animated action comedy that it can't help but...

The Big Sick Movie Review

The Big Sick Movie Review

It may be rather long for a romantic comedy, but this film has such a...

The Emoji Movie Movie Review

The Emoji Movie Movie Review

There's no reason why this animated comedy adventure needed to be this pointless. Solidly entertaining...

Advertisement
England Is Mine Movie Review

England Is Mine Movie Review

While this is billed as a film about The Smiths' singer-songwriter Morrissey, it's actually an...

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets Movie Review

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets Movie Review

It's been 20 years since French filmmaker Luc Besson shook up the sci-fi genre with...

Dunkirk Movie Review

Dunkirk Movie Review

Britain's epic 1940 evacuation of Dunkirk has been dramatised on film before, but no one...

Killing Ground Movie Review

Killing Ground Movie Review

From Australia, this dark and edgy thriller is skilfully made by writer-director Damien Power to...

City of Ghosts Movie Review

City of Ghosts Movie Review

This award-winning documentary plays like a thriller as it traces the work of a group...

Cars 3 Movie Review

Cars 3 Movie Review

It's been six years since the last Cars movie (there were two Planes movies in...

The Beguiled Movie Review

The Beguiled Movie Review

In her inimitable loose style, Sofia Coppola remakes the 1971 Clint Eastwood movie from a...

Advertisement
Artists
Actors
    Filmmakers
      Artists
      Bands
        Musicians
          Artists
          Celebrities
             
              Artists
              Interviews
                musicians & bands in the news
                  actors & filmmakers in the news
                    celebrities in the news

                      Go Back in Time using our News archive to see what happened on a particular day in the past.