Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life

"Weak"

Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life Review


What is it about archaeology that makes us want to go to the movies? Is it the magic of being able to breathe life into ancient legends, like the riddle of the Sphinx and the lost city of Atlantis? Is it the illusion of uncovering the secrets behind grand and mystical artifacts, like the Ark of the Covenant and the Holy Grail? Or is it simply the white bodysuit that fits Angelina Jolie so tightly that you can't possibly avoid looking at her nipples?

If you chose the latter, you'll definitely want to arrive on time to see Tomb Raider sequel Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life, for the first twenty minutes are packed with plenty to gawk at. There's Jolie -- er, Croft -- riding in on a jet ski wearing a black sports bra and soaking wet shorts. There's Croft climbing aboard a ship as seductively as possible while two deckhands watch greedily. There's Croft appearing on deck in the all-too-critical bodysuit, ready to dive into the water and fight a shark one-on-one. And there's even Croft doing some unnecessary splits in mid-air as she rolls her way toward the mysterious "orb" -- an object that soon becomes the focus of the movie due to the fact that it holds the map to the legendary Pandora's box.

Sadly, once you've seen this much of Cradle of Life, there are few reasons left to stick around. Soon after Croft's water sport antics, director Jan De Bont introduces us to the plot of the story -- and trust me, it is nothing short of predictable.

To summarize, the story's antagonist is Jonathan Reiss (Ciarán Hinds), your typical billionaire madman who always happens to be up to no good. For reasons that are never quite clear, Reiss can't wait to get his hands on Pandora's Box and unleash its latent evil upon the world, and so he hires the leader of a notorious Chinese gang to steal the aforementioned orb right out of Croft's hands. To get it back -- and thereby save the world -- Croft must enlist the services of her former lover Terry Sheridan (Gerard Butler), who is not only serving out a prison sentence at the moment, but is also the only person on the planet who can take Croft to the gang hideout. Together, the power-packed duo go on a quest for the orb that takes them across too many continents, puts them in touch with too many old friends, and throws them in the midst of too many uninspired moments of passion to elicit much more than a few snorts and eye rolls from the audience.

The end result is a movie that tries -- and fails -- to be much more than it really is. Perhaps if De Bont and screenwriter Dean Gregorias had simply focused on the one thing that teenage fans of the Lara Croft video game really wanted to see -- great action scenes involving their scantily clad heroine -- they might have had something. But as it has turned out, Cradle of Life is a movie that lets its own plot get in the way of its good parts. And what good is that?

Get De Bont's commentary on the new DVD, along with alternate scenes and the usual featurettes. Gerard Butler's screen test is also included along with a pair of music videos spawned from the film.

Wonder if she'll pop an unnecessary wheelie?



Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life

Facts and Figures

Run time: 117 mins

In Theaters: Friday 25th July 2003

Box Office USA: $65.6M

Box Office Worldwide: $156.5M

Budget: $95M

Distributed by: Paramount Pictures

Production compaines: Paramount Pictures, Mutual Film Company, British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC), Lawrence Gordon Productions, Eidos Interactive, Toho-Towa, October Pictures

Reviews

Contactmusic.com: 2 / 5

Rotten Tomatoes: 24%
Fresh: 40 Rotten: 126

IMDB: 5.5 / 10

Cast & Crew

Director:

Starring: as Lara Croft, as Terry Sheridan, as Bryce, as Kosa, as Sean, as Chen Lo, as Nicholas Petraki, Fabiano Martell as Jimmy Petraki, as MI6 Agent Stevens, as MI6 Agent Calloway, as Hillary, Jonny Coyne as Gus Petraki (as Jonathan Coyne)

Contactmusic


Links



Advertisement

New Movies

Colossal Movie Review

Colossal Movie Review

It's rare to find a movie that so defiantly refuses to be put into a...

King Arthur: Legend of the Sword Movie Review

King Arthur: Legend of the Sword Movie Review

It's unlikely that Guy Ritchie could make a boring movie if he wanted to. This...

Snatched Movie Review

Snatched Movie Review

It doesn't really matter that the script for this lively action-comedy is paper thin: teaming...

Jawbone Movie Review

Jawbone Movie Review

Boxing movies aren't usually this thoughtful. Sure, there are plenty of punchy moments in the...

Whisky Galore! Movie Review

Whisky Galore! Movie Review

Scottish filmmaker Gillies MacKinnon (Hideous Kinky) remakes the 1949 Ealing comedy classic, although it's difficult...

Alien: Covenant Movie Review

Alien: Covenant Movie Review

Master filmmaker Ridley Scott is back to continue the story 10 years after the events...

The Journey (2017) Movie Review

The Journey (2017) Movie Review

A fictionalised account of real events, this drama is reminiscent of Peter Morgan's work in...

Advertisement
Sleepless Movie Review

Sleepless Movie Review

In remaking the 2011 French thriller Sleepless Night, the filmmakers have dumbed down both the...

Unlocked Movie Review

Unlocked Movie Review

By injecting a steady sense of fun, this slick but mindless action thriller both holds...

Lady Macbeth Movie Review

Lady Macbeth Movie Review

A seriously impressive feature directing debut with a star-making central performance, this period British drama...

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 Movie Review

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 Movie Review

It was never going to be easy to match the impact of 2014's Guardians of...

The Promise Movie Review

The Promise Movie Review

The director of Hotel Rwanda, Terry George, turns to another humanitarian horror: the systematic murder...

Their Finest Movie Review

Their Finest Movie Review

Skilfully written, directed and acted, this offbeat British period film tells a story that catches...

Unforgettable Movie Review

Unforgettable Movie Review

With heavy echoes of trashy thrillers like Fatal Attraction, this movie overcomes its painfully simplistic...

Advertisement
Artists
Actors
    Filmmakers
      Artists
      Bands
        Musicians
          Artists
          Celebrities
             
              Artists
              Interviews
                musicians & bands in the news
                  actors & filmmakers in the news
                    celebrities in the news

                      Go Back in Time using our News archive to see what happened on a particular day in the past.