Blade: Trinity

"Terrible"

Blade: Trinity Review


Look up trinity in the dictionary and it will tell you that it's the union of three closely related members. That's a clever guise for this, the third movie about the half-human, half-vampire Marvel comic book hero named Blade. Yet, the film that's lurking under this misnomer is remarkably dissimilar to the original spectacle of the previous two films. This unimaginative mess isn't worthy of such a witty title -- just call it Blade III.

David S. Goyer, who wrote the first two Blade films, not only pens this edition, but now takes the reins as its director. At the controls, Goyer is like a kid out of control in a candy store. With all of the eye-popping cinematic sweets at his fingertips, Goyer samples each piece, but can never settle on a specific style that's cohesive and complementary to the action. The final product resembles what you might expect from a teenager: a quick-paced arcade game set to an obnoxiously loud, mind-numbing metal, hip-hop, and techno score.

The plot is equally raw and underdeveloped. After Blade (Wesley Snipes) is set-up by vampire diva Danica (Parker Posey) to kill a human, he finds himself the target of the FBI. In a fiery showdown with the Feds, Blade is captured. While in custody, Blade is poked and prodded by doctors and agents who deny the existence of vampires and insist Blade's just a sociopath. Not surprisingly, these same "officials" are actually vampires themselves!

Blade's in desperate need of a lifeline, and he gets one from the Nightstalkers, a rogue group of expertly trained vampire hunters led by Whistler's long lost daughter Abigail (Jessica Biel), and her partner Hannibal King (Ryan Reynolds). They rescue the unappreciative Blade, and inform him that the vampires have resurrected the original vampire, Dracula. Now referred to as Drake, Dracula (Dominic Purcell) is set to use his uncanny ability to change forms and exist in the daylight to hunt down Blade. Unbeknownst to the vampires, the Nightstalkers are prepared to fight back with a virus aimed at wiping out the entire vampire race.

Even for diehard fans of the comic series or the first two movies, it's difficult to imagine this film satisfying for anyone. Trinity tries to be inventive by introducing new vampire hybrids (in a Rottweiler and a Pomeranian), brave new allies, and intricate new weapons. Yet, much of this is severely overshadowed by dialogue that is corny, irrelevant, and laughably bad. Numerous combat sequences end before we even see them begin (thanks to the fast-paced editing), while those that linger tend to run exhaustively long. The plug should have been pulled on this video game long ago.

The two-disc DVD features a mound of extras. Ten extra minutes are incorporated into the unrated version of the film, two commentary tracks, an amusing alternate ending, gag reel, and a couple of featurettes. Blade fans will kill for it.

Preparing for Blade: Quaternity.



Blade: Trinity

Facts and Figures

Run time: 113 mins

In Theaters: Wednesday 8th December 2004

Box Office USA: $52.4M

Box Office Worldwide: $128.9M

Budget: $65M

Distributed by: New Line Cinema

Production compaines: Marvel Studios, New Line Cinema, Amen Ra Films, Imaginary Forces

Reviews

Contactmusic.com: 1 / 5

Rotten Tomatoes: 26%
Fresh: 42 Rotten: 122

IMDB: 5.9 / 10

Cast & Crew

Director:

Starring: as Blade, as Whistler, as Drake, as Abigail Whistler, as Hannibal King, as Danica Talos, Paul Michael Lévesque as Jarko Grimwood, Mark Berry as Chief Martin Vreede, as Dr. Edgar Vance, as Asher Talos, Paul Anthony as Wolfe, as Virago, Michael Anthony Rawlins as Wilson Hale, as Ray Cumberland, as Sommerfield, Ginger Broatch as Zoe, as Hedges, as Bentley Tittle, as Goth Vixen Wannabe

Contactmusic


Links



Advertisement

New Movies

Wind River Movie Review

Wind River Movie Review

After writing the superb Sicario and Hell or High Water, Taylor Sheridan moves back into...

The Vault Movie Review

The Vault Movie Review

Filmmakers Dan Bush and Conal Byrne attempt a mash-up of a frantic heist movie with...

Goon: Last of the Enforcers Movie Review

Goon: Last of the Enforcers Movie Review

The 2012 Canadian comedy Goon was one of those surprising little films that snuck up...

Detroit Movie Review

Detroit Movie Review

After The Hurt Locker and Zero Dark Thirty, Kathryn Bigelow and Mark Boal reteam to...

Logan Lucky Movie Review

Logan Lucky Movie Review

Good news: Steven Soderbergh's well-publicised retirement from directing only lasted about four years. He's back...

American Made Movie Review

American Made Movie Review

An enjoyably freewheeling tone and Tom Cruise's star wattage combine to make this an entertaining...

An Inconvenient Sequel: Truth to Power Movie Review

An Inconvenient Sequel: Truth to Power Movie Review

It's been a decade since Al Gore's wake-up-call documentary won the Oscar. And here he...

Advertisement
The Hitman's Bodyguard Movie Review

The Hitman's Bodyguard Movie Review

It really doesn't matter that this movie is utterly ridiculous, because the central pairing of...

Final Portrait Movie Review

Final Portrait Movie Review

A relaxed, amusing true story about noted Swiss painter and sculptor Alberto Giacometti, this sharply...

Tom of Finland Movie Review

Tom of Finland Movie Review

Finnish artist Tuoko Laaksonen used the name "Tom of Finland" as he drew explicit illustrations...

A Ghost Story Movie Review

A Ghost Story Movie Review

Filmmaker David Lowery reunites the stars from his offbeat Western Ain't Them Bodies Saints for...

Atomic Blonde Movie Review

Atomic Blonde Movie Review

From the co-director of John Wick, this similarly styled action romp puts Charlize Theron front...

Girls Trip Movie Review

Girls Trip Movie Review

This movie's premise basically sounds like The Hangover with added black girl power. But it's...

Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie Movie Review

Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie Movie Review

There's so much manic energy in this animated action comedy that it can't help but...

Advertisement
Artists
Actors
    Filmmakers
      Artists
      Bands
        Musicians
          Artists
          Celebrities
             
              Artists
              Interviews
                musicians & bands in the news
                  actors & filmmakers in the news
                    celebrities in the news

                      Go Back in Time using our News archive to see what happened on a particular day in the past.