The pair were expected to tie the knot before splitting in 2001.
But blonde Van Outen - who recently appeared in Chicago on the London West End stage - says his cocaine battle became too much for her to handle.
She says, "I probably wasn't very supportive. I don't mean to be awful, but it is not my problem.
"I've offered before to give up my career and be there, stupidly, but the problem with anyone in that state is that there is nothing you can do to make them happy.
The VIRTUAL INSANITY singer has admitted narcotics have played a huge part in his life.
He recently confessed, "Cocaine is everywhere in this business. There were times when, through drugs, I was completely at the end of my tether."